There is a trend going around in one of the groups I am in where people choose one word to define their year.

Think about it. If you were setting one word to sum up 2023, what would it be?

For some, it might be profit, marketing, or cases. Others might choose something more abstract like dedication, focus, or growth.

Here is the word I want to suggest:

Happy

What could you do in 2023 to be happy? Or what could you accomplish this year that, if you did nothing else, you would look back on and feel proud of?

At the end of the day, we often use money as a tool to measure success. But if we put our own happiness first, we would make many decisions in ways that are better for us long term.

And yes, I think about that study a lot. The one where one of the biggest predictors of happiness was not being a lawyer.

But to me, that is nonsense. I am a lawyer, and I am happy. So forget that study.

Here are my five tips for being happy as a lawyer.

1. Answer These Three Questions

• How much money do I need to make?
• How much do I want to be working?
• What work do I want to be doing?

The first question is about necessity. You need to pay your bills, put food on the table, and save for retirement. Set that baseline. Beat it by a lot if you want to. But define it so you know what you truly need.

After that, be selfish. Define what you want. If you want to work zero hours a week, great. Write it down and start making decisions that move you toward that goal. The sky is the limit, and often the bigger you aim, the better you perform.

The last question is probably the most important. Let me explain with a short story.

I am always excited when our marketing clients email us about record months or years. But recently I received an email that made me genuinely happy. It was about hiring another employee because of increased workload and asking who they should hire. Story shared with permission.

So who would you hire if you had too much work?

Your answer might be clear. But it will be different for everyone.

If you love marketing, you might hire another lawyer to handle the legal work.
If you love doing legal work, you might hire someone to manage the day-to-day operations.
If you love managing the office, you might hire a marketer to generate more revenue so you can build a stronger team.

No answer is wrong. But some answers are wrong for you.

You need to know what legal work you want to do so you can hire someone to handle what you do not.

2. Create Physical Things

For many of us, at the end of a long day, there is nothing tangible to show for it. Maybe a stack of papers.

Your client is not in prison for the rest of their life.
Your motion was filed, and now a mom can see her kids again.
You secured a large check for medical care.

Those wins matter. But you cannot always see them.

So find a hobby that produces something tangible.

Gardening. Woodworking. Painting. Baking. My wife bakes a lot. It is impressive, although slightly dangerous for the wardrobe.

Find something you can see. And be terrible at it.

Rod Stewart has spent over 25 years building an enormous model train collection. This is not a joke. It is also not a side hustle.

It is a hobby.

3. Keep Score

How do you know if you won a case? What does success look like for your firm? How do you measure your impact?

Maybe it is dollars recovered.
Maybe it is nights a client gets with their kids.
Maybe it is how many wills or trusts are completed within four weeks of hiring you.

Find a metric you can track easily that demonstrates your work and its positive impact.

Make your impact visible.

4. Stop Doing the Work You Do Not Want to Do

Seriously.

Do not take the case you are unsure about.
Turn down the client who yelled at your staff.
Say no to the pro bono project you feel obligated to accept but do not actually want.

No is a complete sentence.

You already know the horror stories. You have lived them. So say no now and avoid regret later.

In Start With Why, there is a story about how Apple says no to good ideas. They even say no to great ideas. It has to be an excellent idea and an excellent fit.

Think differently.

5. Take Time for Yourself

If you prefer the term self-care, use that. But this is about being intentional.

Open your calendar.

Block time for your hobby.
Block time for your doctor appointments.
Block time for a morning walk.
Block time to pick up your kids from school.
Block time to watch the trashy reality show you enjoy.

Living by your calendar can be incredibly liberating if you actually follow it.

Take time for yourself. You have my permission, if you need it.

Final Thoughts

Life will happen while you are busy doing everything else. But how you show up is in your control.

You can show up exhausted, overwhelmed, and constantly behind. Or you can show up as the slightly unconventional lawyer who does not yell and who smiles more often than expected.

The choice is yours.

Important Caveat

You do not have an excuse to ignore your well-being.

If you have medical challenges, physical or mental, give yourself more grace and take more time. You cannot pour from an empty cup. You cannot help others if you are depleted. Put on your own oxygen mask first.

You have this.

And if you need support, I am here to help.

I hope you enjoyed the first newsletter of 2023.

Until then, have a great weekend. And please do not kidnap Kevin Bacon as a belated holiday gift.