Growing up, I freaking loved everything dark and gritty.
I was a kid, and thankfully life was easy. Or, in financial terms, I was someone else’s bill.
So stuff like Preacher (the comic, not the show), Ender’s Game (the book, not the movie*), and 28 Days Later (the movie, not the… not movie?) I ate that up.
And then, if I’m being honest, as life got more challenging, I shied away from that stuff.
Law school was a huge time suck. Opening my own firm was a struggle. Becoming a dad really changed my world in ways I had no idea about.
I’m not a massive fan of the Chris Nolan Batman movies. I didn’t enjoy a bunch of Quentin Tarantino movies, but the first ten minutes of UP gets me every time.
(Game of Thrones is probably the one exception that proves this rule.)
For a long while, dark and gritty just wasn’t the escape I wanted, so I changed my habits.
Hell, I even read some YA novels in my mid-20s. For the record, Divergent is a much better story idea, but Hunger Games is much better written. I never tried anything Twilight.
To this day, I cannot watch Handmaid’s Tale because it’s too accurate to modern life.
But I can happily share that my life has returned to a much better place over the last three to five years, and I am finally on the dark and gritty train again.
I really enjoyed Zack Snyder’s four-hour Justice League, and the John Wick movies are awesome. Last week, I watched The Bear, and I have to be honest, I don’t recall the last show I enjoyed as much that made me so damn uncomfortable.
Without spoiling anything, the show dives into the grit of Chicago and the darkness of running a restaurant, with scenes crammed into a small (and I assume super hot) kitchen. It doesn’t let up.
It made me uncomfortable, but in such a fun way.
It also made me realize that’s where I found a lot of my semi-recent success: I got out of my comfort zone.
It was easy to stay referral-driven and have a $500,000-a-year firm.
It was easy to keep changing marketing companies that weren’t a good fit.
It was easy to not stay on top of my systems and processes and get anal about trying to be the best at what I do every day.
But you can only coast downhill.
So if you want to stay on top, you must keep getting uncomfortable.
Learn a new skill.
Try a new hobby.
Say yes to the next opportunity. Maybe you’ll fall in love with Zooey Deschanel.
I freaking love this Anthony Bourdain quote. Or maybe he didn’t say it, but it’s still great:
“Eat at a local restaurant tonight. Get the cream sauce. Have a cold pint at 4 o’clock in a mostly empty bar. Go somewhere you’ve never been. Listen to someone you think may have nothing in common with you. Order the steak rare. Eat an oyster. Have a negroni. Have two. Be open to a world where you may not understand or agree with the person next to you, but have a drink with them anyway. Eat slowly. Tip your server. Check in on your friends. Check in on yourself. Enjoy the ride.”
Shake it up a bit.
For Your Law Firm
- Try a new marketing tactic.
- Post that video you’ve been hesitant to share.
- Finally pull the trigger on that hire you’ve been wish-washing.
I’ll be honest. Maybe you’ll fail. But if you do, so what? Figure out why it failed, and you’ll learn for the next time. Maybe that uncomfortable moment now will help you later.
I have a friend who was a Jehovah’s Witness and can cold call like a pro because she:
- Had the door slammed in her face
- Got cursed out
- Had sprinklers turned on her
So now, what could upset her over the phone? (And to be fair, we cannot and should not cold call, but I hope you get the point.)
Sometimes you need those hard moments to become the person you were meant to be. Or maybe you’ll succeed.
If you’re stuck on a limiting belief, here it is: you have permission to break free. Reply to this email, and we can chat.